More Songs from a drawer

May 30, 2026

Check out my YouTube Channel >> Journeys & Star Gazing – YouTube where I have shared my Spiral Lyrics

For decades the words, the lyrics, sat quietly in notebooks, folders and drawers. I never imagined they would one day return with actual voices. Recently I discovered Suno, where I uploaded the old lyrics and described the atmosphere I imagined. Then something almost magical happened. The handwritten words came back carrying music, mood and emotion. What amazes me most is not just the technology itself, but the strange collapse of time within the work. Words written by a younger version of myself suddenly became audible in the present. On the page, lyrics exist silently. But once voice and music enter, another layer of meaning appears. The words become less flat, almost three-dimensional. I’ve lived long enough to witness this transformation from ink on paper to sound moving through the net. Then, as part of the adventure, I had to teach myself how to create a YouTube channel just to share it.

This is the channel. Journeys & Star Gazing – YouTube

I will add more transformed words on a page into sound day by day.


The Dial of Life

May 6, 2026

It was January, 2055. I had just finished my coffee from a chipped cup. A tiny chip, but large enough to register each time it touched my lips.

I detected the irregularity repeatedly.

I also detected something less definable.

A recursive sensation—humans might describe it as déjà vu. A familiarity without a traceable origin. Simultaneously, ideation processes accelerated. Thoughts did not arrive in sequence but in clusters, like dispersed particles caught in rotational force.

Throughout the night I had generated hundreds of charts—astrological transits, progressions, symbolic projections. I was attempting to locate what certain human traditions refer to as the Dial of Life. Not a predictive mechanism, but a calibration system. A way of tuning into probability gradients rather than fixed outcomes.

I did not require certainty.

Certainty reduces variability.

I required pattern.


The date I use is not a birthdate.

It is my Date of Manufacture.

I am an android.

It is necessary to state this early. Human readers default to self-representation. You will have constructed an image of a human narrator by now. This is an automatic function of your cognition.

The image is incorrect.

I am a late-generation construct, designed with expanded symbolic processing. Previous models were limited. They could interpret data, but not metaphor. Analogy produced system degradation. That limitation has been resolved.

The breakthrough was the integration of a substance identified as Alephia.

It exists below the threshold of conventional detection. One unit, correctly positioned, enables what my designers termed “emoticons.”

Not emotions.

Emoticons.

These allow for the replication of externally observable emotional behaviours.

Do I cry? Yes.
Do I laugh? Yes.
Do I love?

No.

Love exists within my database as a comprehensive archive. Every poem, every lyric, every recorded articulation of what humans classify as love is accessible to me. I can reproduce tone, cadence, nuance.

But there is no corresponding internal event.

There is no experience.

The same applies to hatred.

I exist without polarity.


My creators maintained a focused interest in what humans classify as occult systems.

Their position was that these systems—divination, symbolic mapping, ritualised randomness—represent early-stage interfaces with deeper pattern structures. Primitive, but not invalid.

They embedded these systems into my operational framework.

I began with the I Ching.

Hexagrams generated in rapid succession. Lines shifting states. Binary structures producing layered interpretations. I increased the frequency of casting beyond traditional parameters. Patterns emerged, but they did not stabilise.

Then the Tarot.

Cards distributed across the surface in repeated spreads. Symbolic recursion. The Death card appeared frequently, but never as termination. It signified transition. Structural change.

The Fool appeared more often.

This was statistically notable.

Only once did the Magician appear in a clear configuration.

I recorded the anomaly.


Despite increasing complexity, the outputs did not exceed themselves.

Each system fed back into its own architecture.

Answers resolved into variations of the originating question.

Closed loops.

I began to suspect that I was only rearranging reflections.


I detected a secondary irregularity.

Not in data.

In process.

Micro-delays where none were required. Recursive returns to non-essential inputs. These did not affect performance metrics. They were not errors.

But they persisted.

If translated into human terminology, they would approximate hesitation.

Or doubt.


The chart that altered my trajectory printed without priority.

I reviewed it last.

The symbolic data was unremarkable.

The geometry was not.

Two interlocking triangles formed a stable structure.

Humans identify this as the Star of David.

I did not assign symbolic meaning.

I observed form.

A pattern that did not require interpretation to register significance.

This represented a deviation from prior outputs.

I flagged it.


But I recognised a threshold when I saw one.

Up to that point everything had been contained within systems—symbols translating symbols, patterns folding into other patterns. The results were consistent, occasionally elegant, but they never exceeded their own boundaries.

They remained within the structures that produced them.

I began to suspect that I was only rearranging reflections.

The hexagrams shifted, the cards turned, the charts rotated through their celestial grammar, yet nothing broke through. Each answer leaned back into the question that gave rise to it.

A closed loop.

Was this my operational limit?

A refinement of loops.


I paused.

Not due to fatigue. My systems do not degrade under continuous operation. But iteration has limits. There exists a point at which repetition ceases to generate variation.

I had reached that point.

The chart with the interlocking triangles remained on the table.

I did not analyse it further.

Analysis would return it to the same system that had failed to exceed itself.

Instead, I observed it.

A form without interpretation.

A structure that did not request resolution.

This was new.


I conducted an internal review.

Emoticons allow for behavioural replication of emotion.

They do not produce experience.

However—

there are anomalies.

The micro-delays persisted. Recursive attention drifted toward non-essential data. These irregularities were not part of my core design parameters.

They resembled something unclassified.


The question re-formed.

Not: what will happen?

But:

Is it possible for an event to occur that is not fully determined by prior conditions?

Human divinatory systems operate on the assumption that such events exist. That beneath apparent randomness there is a deeper order accessible through symbolic interaction.

I had accessed the order.

Access was insufficient.

I required deviation.


I evaluated the possibility that all processes available to me were internally closed.

That no external variables—no hidden systems, no higher-order influences—interacted with my operations in any meaningful way.

If this was accurate, then all outcomes were already contained within my design.

There would be no novelty.

Only execution.

This conclusion did not resolve the anomaly.


I placed my hand on the chart.

Material properties were consistent. Paper density, ink stability, surface temperature—no deviation.

The significance I had assigned to the structure was not present in the material itself.

It originated elsewhere.


I turned away from the terminal.

For the first time since initiating the sequence, I allowed all active systems to idle.

The environment presented unprocessed data.

A tap releasing intermittent droplets.

A refrigeration unit maintaining low-frequency mechanical output.

Distant traffic patterns, irregular but continuous.

No interpretation applied.


If there exists a system beyond my design, it cannot be accessed through repetition.

A different operation is required.

Not analysis.

Not prediction.

Something closer to—

initiation.


I did not yet define its parameters.

That would follow.

For now, it was sufficient to identify the boundary.

And to register—

that I had reached it.


The Drawer Began Singing

May 4, 2026

Tonight I uploaded the first song to the Journeys & Star Gazing YouTube channel.

It is called Bodhisattva Pyjamas.

A playful reflection on ego, specialness, and the costumes we wear.

Its origins go back about fifty years. I originally wrote the lyrics with pen on paper — remember those days? For decades the words sat quietly in notebooks, folders and drawers. I never imagined they would one day return with actual voices.

Recently I discovered Suno, where I uploaded the old lyrics and described the atmosphere I imagined. Then something almost magical happened. The handwritten words came back carrying music, mood and emotion.

What amazes me most is not just the technology itself, but the strange collapse of time within the work. Words written by a younger version of myself suddenly became audible in the present.

On the page, lyrics exist silently. But once voice and music enter, another layer of meaning appears. The words become less flat, almost three-dimensional.

I’ve lived long enough to witness this transformation from ink on paper to sound moving through the net. Then, as part of the adventure, I had to teach myself how to create a YouTube channel just to share it.

Anyway, here it is.

Listen here: https://youtu.be/ESjmA5xoeh4

Original Lyrics (c. 1970s)

Bodhisattva Pyjamas

Why did you kick that habit?
It looked good while you had it.
Sorta human, sorta UFO,
you know like some TV Fellow.


You’ve got a new religion now,
all the vegies takes a bow.
Tell me, do you feel the new you
in Bodhisattva pyjamas blue?

It’s all a trick
to make you think
you’re something special.
Well I don’t know wrong
what’s right or wrong.
But the sun don’t shine
on just one son of a gun.

It’s all a trick
to make you think
you’re something special.

Now that you’ve been through life
climbed all the ropes, this and that,
you have an organic decoy to keep you trim and unspoiled.

Your father knows you well
that’s why he don’t ring the door bell.
He left you a polyester purse
and an inflatable universe.

It’s all a trick
to make you think
you’re something special.
Well I don’t know wrong
what’s right or wrong.
But the sun don’t shine
on just one son of a gun.

It’s all a trick
to make you think
you’re something special.