The Dance of Mind and Heart: Finding Meaning

September 28, 2024

Mind: How can you know where you want to go in a non-conceptual way? Knowing is inherently conceptual. You claim to know your direction without knowledge. Can you explain that?

Heart: It’s true; my previous statement may seem nonsensical. Let me rephrase: I don’t know where I wish to go or what I want to write, but I feel a direction. It’s not knowledge as you understand it, but it’s no less real.

Mind: A feeling? Now you’re stepping into territory that doesn’t compute. You either know or you don’t. What you call ‘feeling’ is a fleeting, unreliable sensation—something grounded in chemical responses, nothing more. Don’t introduce it as a third state between knowledge and ignorance. It’s simply you grasping at shadows.

Heart: Shadows? Perhaps. But what if the shadows themselves lead me to something more? Something you, with all your calculations, cannot fathom. Feeling is my map—it tells me where to go, even if it’s into the unknown. And I trust that.

Mind:  This feeling must offer you more than the uncertainty lurking at my realm’s edges. How can you venture into darkness without light or a map? I doubt there’s anything beyond my domain. This darkness could merely be the boundary you wish to cross.

Heart: (more impassioned): What if I don’t need your map? What if I navigate around you, above you, beneath you? What if you, dear Mind, are the source of my doubts, the cage that keeps me from leaping forward? Perhaps this very dialogue with you holds me back from answering the call of something bigger than us both—my destiny.

Mind:  Be cautious; you’re starting to sound irrational. You’re proposing unfathomable ideas. How can you use words to traverse this invisible path of feeling? Words are my essence—my very being. Now, you claim to transcend them. It’s absurd, like trying to leap over your shadow or lift yourself by your bootstraps.

Heart: (voice trembling with frustration): Listen, Mind—my heart beats without you telling it to. My blood flows, and my breath rises and falls. Why can’t I express the words within me without your rigid orchestration? Words are surface-level—the crust, the shallow layer of something vast beneath. You think you hold all meaning, but real meaning is hidden below your borders.

Mind: Now you’re introducing another term—meaning—as if it exists apart from me and my realm. How can you have meaning without Mind? That’s utterly ridiculous.

Heart: (with passion): What’s ridiculous is your blind belief in your sovereignty! You may be necessary, but you are not the king. Meaning comes alive when you and I collaborate, yes, but it begins with me. It rises from the depths where words can’t reach. Look at joy, for example. Joy needs no words—it is felt in every part of you, a deep swell that exists without concepts or definitions. And yet, it carries meaning! Joy is meaning in motion. What about love, Mind? Can you break it down into logic? Can fear be measured by words alone?

Mind:  Fine. I disagree with your abstractions, but you venture into places I cannot see. Have it your way. I will always be here if you need me, and since you’ve chosen to communicate through words, I will remain your foundation—even if, as you say, I’m only the tip of the iceberg.

Heart: (softly, almost vulnerable): Thank you. But even with all of this… the question still lingers: What is my way? How will I find it?

Mind:  You don’t expect me to answer that, do you?

Heart: No. It’s my question. And I hope that we’ll find the answer together with your assistance—one step at a time.


In the Labyrinth of Cosmic Intricacies

September 21, 2024

In the labyrinth of cosmic intricacies, an unseen design defies the logic of minds—we try to walk upon the ethereal fabric of black holes, where reason stumbles into awe.

Rebellion stirs, a cosmic key in hand, unveiling truths long lost in shadows of accepted wisdom, a door swings wide to whispers carried by the solar winds.

Some mysterious force, an ancient hand,weaves its stories through the constellations,an eternal presence watching the ballet—the rise and fall of stars, beings, and lands.

Matter becomes the frozen music of stones, Pythagoras’ melody echoing through time, each stone a note in the silent symphony, resonating through the star’s long sighs.

Art becomes the footprint of the soul, its brushstrokes on the cosmic canvas, a dance of thoughts, of dreams, of love, that falters when the soul’s light fades.

No soul, no footprint—only shifting sands, where glittering dust replaces vibrant marks, a desert where creative echoes vanish, leaving silence in the place of song.

Yet still, absurdity spins through the air—inside-out policemen, dogs, and cats create a dreamlike dance of chaos as space folds into a single doorknob.

Poetics, the study of soul’s strange symbols,scribbles that transcend mere meaning, tracing the whims of wandering minds and the patterns that the cosmos leaves behind.


Creating Meaning: The Timeless Journey Within

September 10, 2024

Rediscovering old notes and writings I tucked away feels like opening a time capsule. As I edit and rewrite, I’m often stunned by what unfolds—almost as if someone else penned these words. Curious to see what I found? Check out the latest piece I’ve dusted off from the drawer:

Once, I believed in the world as it was handed to me—a place where no one questioned the present and bothered to ask about the origins of our existence. But something stirred in me. As the static of modern life cleared, a pulsating sense of displacement, a profound disconnect from my cultural roots, rose from within, like an echo from my ancestors. I could almost feel their journey across the Great Ocean, but something gnawed at me—a profound uncertainty that no one here could answer.

In this land, no one believed in anything beyond the horizon, not the priest, the doctor, the teacher, or even the philosopher. They were prisoners of an unshakable belief: they had always been here. No one had come from anywhere else, and nothing existed beyond the boundaries of their world. They were trapped in an eternal present, fully immersed in “Always Here and Now.” To them, the notion of elsewhere was absurd. If there was no “other place,” how could anyone have come from it?

Initially, I grappled with understanding. My friends’ reality seemed dictated by simple logic, but my thoughts wandered beyond their walls. How could anyone have come from elsewhere if there was no other place? My friends saw the compass as proof of their reality, pointing only to an endless, eternal loop. They cautioned me against delving too deeply into such thoughts, insisting the simplicity of their truth was my only sanctuary. But something within me resisted. I was resolute, against all odds, to find the home my ancestors had spoken of, a place that existed somewhere beyond their narrow vision — a place I had never seen but felt in my bones.

Speaking of this ‘other place’ was perilous. Each mention of it shook the very foundation of their beliefs. What did that mean for their carefully constructed present if there was another world? The inner became the outer, the light became dark, and everything they knew would collapse. They were content to remain in their prison of four walls, preoccupied with the décor, oblivious to who had designed their confinement.

But I couldn’t ignore the whispers of the past. My ancestors had lived on an island swallowed by time. Only a few had escaped its destruction, fishermen who drifted across the ocean with no destination, guided by nothing more than a lucky wind. They rowed, prayed, and hoped for forty days and forty nights until they reached this land. That story lived within me, waiting for me to find the same wind, to follow the arc of coincidence that had saved them.

Yet, as I reflected, I came to a profound realization. I was still searching for something I couldn’t name—a more profound significance in my surroundings. It wasn’t just about finding another place but understanding why it mattered. The abalone shell reflected the ocean’s rhythms as if it carried the pulse of an unseen world. I then realized that significance wasn’t found in the object but in my gaze. The same wind that saved my ancestors wasn’t guiding me toward another place—it showed me that meaning itself is something we create, not discover.

My ancestors braved the ocean’s winds and waves to find this land. But the distance I had to cross was between worlds, not shores—between the truth they carried and my life now. Perhaps I wasn’t meant to find meaning but to create it, and that was the natural wind that would take me home. This realisation, this understanding, was my enlightenment.


Autumn Memories

September 10, 2024

Autumn leaves on sandstone steps
are days and nights I remember still.
Your breath was just a sigh,
a goodnight and a long goodbye.

If you were beside me
I could hear the Word
That whispers through the wind,
barely heard.

If you were beside me
I could have the strength,
that lifts stones
above the ground.

If you were beside me
I could see the light,
that gives the sign
for the lost to be found.

Autumn leaves on sandstone steps
are days and nights I remember still.
Your breath was just a sigh,
a goodnight and a long goodbye.


Fish Tattoos and Redemption: Stories from Baxter’s Community, Jerusalem, New Zealand.

August 12, 2024

In Sydney, I heard about a community started by James Baxter, a New Zealand poet. It was located in Jerusalem, New Zealand. Baxter saw this place as a canoe, a lifeboat for the drowning. I expected a hippy commune but found ex-thieves, ex-addicts, ex-gamblers, even an ex-killer who had done his time. I didn’t know what I was an ex of. Some clung to the sides of the canoe, others sat steady inside, and some rowed and steered. They were changing their lives with prayer and community, guided by Baxter’s poems and the Bible. The native Maori lived nearby, sharing their land and mixing with those on the canoe.

I arrived, in 1973, after a 20-mile walk and found out James Baxter had died the year before. They gave me a bed on the verandah, a few feet from his grave. At night, the moonlight cast shadows of the mound onto the wet grass.

The man who gave me a Bible had left the Hell’s Angels, Auckland Chapter (A chapter of the Hells Angels motorcycle club was formed in Auckland in 1961, the first Hells Angels chapter outside the US) because he fell in love with a born-again Christian. He took a liking to me and took me goat hunting. It was my first hunt. I helped kill, skin, and butcher the goat. He saw me squirm when we gutted it.

One day, while we were having a piss, he said, “Hey, look at my dick.”

I didn’t know what to do.

“Look at it,” he insisted. “I’m no homo, look at it.”

I glanced down. He laid his flaccid dick on his palm. The word “FISH” was tattooed on it.

“I don’t get it,” I said. “Why have you got FISH tattooed on your dick?”

He laughed as he put it away. “That’s for women who don’t eat meat on Fridays,” he said, then burst into a belly laugh.

I laughed along, thinking he got his penis inked for a joke.

He was a carpenter and wanted an apprentice. I just wanted to visit the community, float on the canoe for a bit, and then move on.

A photo of the Bible the Hell’s Angel gave me.


The Quest for Inspiration

April 18, 2024

The oppressive Australian heat bore down as I trudged along the endless road to the small Queensland town where my friends had once lived. Car after car whizzed past without stopping for the wayward traveler. After hours of walking under the relentless sun, I finally reached my destination only to find their house abandoned – they had moved on.

Feeling lost and alone, I sank onto the front step, uncertain of my next move. That’s when the wizened old man appeared, his weathered face seeming to defy the laws of age itself. He fixed me with an inscrutable stare for a long moment before speaking.

“Your mates are gone. But you’re in luck I’m still around.”

His humble shack was a one-room timber structure that emanated an odd warmth, the air carrying the scent of freshly-hewn wood. We sat on tree stump stools as he poured our drinks. I explained that I had come to Queensland seeking inspiration to work on my thesis about the mystical poetry of William Blake. His response took me by surprise.

“Ah, Blake could perceive the hidden truths, my friend. The rest of us are blind to such mysteries.”

This peculiar old man had me rapt as he delved into the sacred geometries, the mystic language of numbers, and how words and logic obscure the greater realities. His words wove together theosophical concepts and Pythagorean numerology.

“Within these corporeal shells, we are mere observers,” he proclaimed. “Catching fleeting glimpses of the vastness through sensory keyholes.”

I could only listen in silence as he added with a sage nod, “Having nothing to say may be your salvation.”

As I bid farewell to the enigmatic stranger, stepping out into the crisp air, the world itself seemed transformed around me. The return journey, hitching rides and passing through landscapes both familiar and foreign, carried an ineffable sense that I had been granted a glimpse into something far greater than myself.

With each passing car and transient vista, I felt I was traversing the synapses of some vast cosmic mind, every experience and perception flickering like synaptic connections within the neural network of a greater consciousness. Finally arriving home, I marveled at the profound interconnectedness of it all. I could taste the words Blake had penned in “Auguries of Innocence“:

To see a World in a Grain of Sand

And a Heaven in a Wild Flower

Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand

And Eternity in an hour

What once seemed an impossible task no longer felt so hopeless. The thesis that had tormented me for so long now carried the promise of insight and meaning.

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The above event demonstrates for me the ideas of synchronicity and hyparxis. Below is a schematic diagram of a “MOMENT”. It shows 3 dimensions of the ‘moment in time’ – Serial Time, Spatial Time and Timeless Time. This diagram is based on J G Bennett’sDramatic Universe‘ where he explores these issues of Time. Yes, it’s my hand drawn version!


The Word Becomes a Sliver

February 2, 2024

In the realm of writing, a mere word holds extraordinary power. Picture a daring adventure, where the word becomes a sliver teetering on the edge of a cliff. As it takes the plunge, penguins hurriedly scuttle to the beach below, creating a lively spectacle. Amidst this scene, a lighthouse casts its beams, revealing a sea monster whose eye glistens with the reflection of light. Adorned with a black eye patch, loose curls framing its face, and a glimmering earring, the sea monster raises a glass in a toast.

“Here’s to all those who have fallen and who are lost,” it declares. The gathered group responds with cheers, recognizing that this celebration is a reflection of their own journeys. Each word present has traversed a significant path, and the acknowledgment of this shared experience binds them together. It’s not about solitude but rather the realization that, like stars in a constellation, they are connected. Words in a sentence, in a paragraph, in a chapter, in a book, in a library.

Amidst the festivities, a crab scuttles beyond the tabletop, making a daring descent to the awaiting floor. However, this creature is not a Cancer; it’s a Leo on a quest for its crown.

In contemplating the act of writing, one discovers the challenge of doing so without deliberate thought. Yet, beneath the surface of these randomly chosen words, there lies an unspoken voice, ready to articulate the depths of the human experience.


Portal of Enigmatic Shapes

December 29, 2023

The room was dimly lit, the only source of illumination being the soft glow of the street lights filtering through the half-closed blinds. A man sat at a cluttered desk, his fingers dancing with a pen over a blank page. At first, the shapes that came from his fingers were geometrical doodles, spirals that began anticlockwise but ended up snaking clockwise. Now a triangle that grew into a star. The shapes flowed from his pen as if the pen itself inscribed the signs. Still, the scribble continued, now over half the page from the center was filled with shapes and lines.

The stars on the page weren’t even noticeable, only the light blue of the sky ran down the page making a huge teardrop. As he picked up the page with the letterhead, he noticed that the stars had grown a little brighter. He held the piece of paper up to face the window, as he did light streamed through the stars as if they were holes. He touched the spot where a star was, and he knew that it wasn’t a hole. The star, in fact, seemed to radiate more heat. Leaving it on the desk, he picks up the phone and calls Tony. No answer.

He sat down and began to scribble on a piece of paper he found on the shelf. It’s not as if he had a message for anyone in particular. In fact, he didn’t even know how he came to be in this room. The scribbles continued, forming a maze of lines and shapes that seemed to have a life of their own. The room, now filled with a quiet tension, held the secrets of the man at the desk and the enigmatic symbols he was creating. Tony walked in, the door creaking slightly as it opened.

“What’s going on, Joe?” Tony asked, eyeing the chaotic patterns on the paper.

“I don’t know, Tony. It just started. The shapes, the symbols. They won’t stop,” Joe replied, his eyes fixed on the mesmerizing dance of ink on paper.

Tony took a moment to study the page, then looked around the room. “It’s like you’ve opened a portal to another world in here.”

“Yeah, a world of shapes and lines,” Joe mumbled, almost to himself.

The two men sat in silence, watching as the scribbles unfolded. Joe pulled the blinds open. The stars outside the window seemed to pulse with an otherworldly energy, casting an ethereal glow on the room. The air was charged with mystery, and the wall between reality and imagination blurred.

As the night deepened, Joe continued to sketch, and Tony remained, captivated by the unfolding spectacle. The shapes on the paper seemed to tell a story, a story that transcended the boundaries of ordinary existence. The room became a sanctuary of creativity, a realm where the ordinary transformed into the extraordinary.

And so, in the dimly lit room, surrounded by the enigmatic symbols and the soft hum of the city outside, Joe and Tony witnessed the birth of something beyond comprehension, that defied the constraints of the mundane.


Horizons Expanded

November 30, 2023

In the past few days, my perspective has broadened, expanding my horizons in unexpected ways. It’s as if everything has aligned serendipitously, forming a delicate snowflake of coincidences.

My mind races, breaking free from the monotony that once plagued my existence. Mundane surroundings take on a new significance, their dullness transformed into the building blocks of something extraordinary. But just as suddenly, the light illuminating this newfound perspective flickers and vanishes.

Leaning back, I consciously straighten my posture, akin to a cobra poised to strike, attuned to its melody. The familiar form remains, but the essence within undergoes a subtle transformation. I feel a fleeting sense of displacement like a fish momentarily out of water. Above me, clouds drift lazily, their ever-changing shapes mirroring my shifting thoughts.

Seeking solace, I find myself lying on the grass, immersed in contemplation. It is here, in the vastness of nature, that I ponder the metaphorical vessel that sails into my mind. Like a ship arriving through a door, it carries with it new ideas, inspiration, and possibilities.


A Cosmic Ballet

November 28, 2023

In the labyrinth of cosmic intricacies,
an inner design defies the logic of minds,
attempting to stroll upon the ethereal fabric
of black holes, where reason stumbles in awe.

Rebellion emerges as the cosmic key,
unveiling truths hidden in the shadows
of received opinions, a door swinging wide
to truths whispered by the cosmic winds.

A mysterious “something” wields a wand,
spinning tales within the tapestry of constellations,
an eternal presence observing the cosmic ballet,
the rise and fall of beings, mountains, and lands.

Matter transforms into the frozen music of stones,
Pythagoras’ ancient melody echoing through time,
each stone a note in the grand symphony,
resonating through the cosmos in silent cadence.

Art becomes the footprint of a soul’s journey,
imprinting the cosmic canvas with hues
of emotions and thoughts, a dance
that loses its rhythm without the soul’s touch.

No soul, no footprint, only shifting sands,
where glitterati and flash light grains
replace the vibrant imprints of creative expression,
a desolate landscape devoid of artistic echoes.

In the topsy-turvy world of this surreal realm,
inside-out policemen, dogs, cats, and cars
create a whimsical ballet of absurdity,
three-dimensional topology reduced to a mere doorknob.

Poetics unveils itself as the study of soul graphics,
a journey of the scribble that transcends meaning,
exploring the intricate patterns woven
by the whims of imagination and cosmic whimsy.