“Third eye’s open, but I’m still blind—must’ve bought the knockoff.”
—Whispers from the Algorithm
The Third Eye Is Pointed at the Sky When I Bend Over
This is soul-searching—but not the soft-focus, candlelit kind they sell you in Instagram ads.
It’s the kind of soul-searching that starts when you wake up at 3 a.m. in a cold sweat, realizing your entire personality might be a subscription service. When the thoughts hit so hard you can’t scroll them away.
It’s a tuning of the inner dial—not for good vibes, but to find whatever truth is still leaking through the static. Because let’s be clear: this isn’t about finding peace. It’s about noticing you’ve been sold a leash with a smile.
The revolution?
It’s wearing eyeliner now and dancing on TikTok for likes.
Your rebellion has been repackaged into a hoodie with a brand logo and a mission statement. Every radical thought you’ve had is now available in four easy payments, with free shipping and a 10% discount if you sell your friends out too.
We used to throw rocks at kings. Now we rate their content. Welcome to the age of the black magician. No wands. No robes. Just copywriters, influencers, and people who learned to spell authenticity in Helvetica. And here’s the kicker: they don’t just sell you soap anymore.
They sell you your own face, reflected in a polished screen, whispering:
“You’re almost enough. Just one more upgrade.” It’s not just advertising. It’s sorcery.
And the real spell?
Convincing you that the answers were never inside you—but conveniently waiting in someone’s cart. Let’s talk about the new high priests of this digital cathedral:
Influencers.
They used to be your neighbors.
Now they’re lifestyle oracles.
Curated messiahs with ring lights and discount codes.
Their job isn’t to be real—it’s to look real enough that you’ll follow them straight into the abyss of comparison and consumption. They call it “sharing.”
It’s selling.
They call it “vulnerability.”
It’s emotional clickbait.
And they don’t even know they’re doing it—because the spell caught them first.
They are the product and the packaging, wrapped in digital incense and filtered light.
Their third eye?
Trademarked. Verified. Brand-aligned.
But me?
I’ll take the third eye that ancient Greek playwright joked about—the one that points to the heavens when you bend over. Yeah, that one.
Crude, sure. But it had better aim than the polished, bullshit eye they’re selling me now. That third eye at least had the decency to laugh at the gods, not pretend to be one.
Because the new spirituality isn’t about waking up. It’s about signing up. Log in. Add to cart. Manifest your dream life with our 7-step program and don’t forget to leave a review.
And if you’re not ready to pay for it? Well, then you’re not “aligned” yet. Your resistance is your poverty speaking. They’ll shame you in pastel colors and smiling fonts. This is soul robbery in broad daylight.
And we’re clapping along to the rhythm because the beat’s got a good hook.
The psychic supermarket is open 24/7.
Insight™
Power™
Your Best Self™
All available now, pre-packaged and promise-wrapped.
But here’s the sick twist: no matter how much you buy, you’ll always feel behind. Because the product isn’t transformation—it’s lack. Permanent, bottomless, sponsored lack.
And if you ever wake up—if you ever really see it—someone’s there, waiting, ready to sell you the antidote to the thing they sold you in the first place.
“You’ve always been just one more product away from peace.”
—Echoes from the Discount Nirvana Aisle
Maybe that’s what I’m doing now.
Maybe this whole rant is a spell of its own—an exorcism, or maybe just me screaming into the neon-stained void, hoping someone still knows what it feels like to be human underneath all the branding.
There’s a war happening.
Not with tanks.
With images.
The battle isn’t good vs. evil—it’s what kind of image will sit on the throne of your psyche.
One builds an altar to ego, likes, and carefully measured virtue signals.
The other might actually save the goddamn planet.
Because what’s killing us isn’t evil—it’s performance.
The performance of care.
The performance of identity.
The performance of being real.
We’re drowning in simulations of sincerity, while the real thing starves in a basement somewhere, forgotten.
And so the question is this:
Are you buying a product?
Or selling a piece of your soul?
Are you seeing with your own eyes?
Or watching through the lens of a third eye™ brought to you by the latest mindfulness app?
Because the spell only works if you don’t know it’s being cast.
But once you see it—really see it—there’s no going back.
And maybe that’s what they’re really afraid of.
“Enlightenment now comes with a promo code.”
—Found scrawled in the margins of a mindfulness app

Posted by stavr0s 
